Years ago, one of the older women who had attended a ladies’ retreat at camp complained to me that she did not learn anything from the sessions. She was disappointed in the speaker. Her attitude was all around negative. I don’t remember what the speaker taught that year. I do remember that for the first time in many years, our attendance numbers were going up, and the influx of new attenders was primarily of younger women who had less mature faith. What I told her was that we don’t always learn something new, but that does not mean our presence is wasted. There are times that God desires us to show up because our prayers matter, the encouragement we have to offer others matters, and being available to have conversations with others makes a difference. I encouraged her to show up to offer how she could be a blessing rather than complaining that she had not been blessed. She has continued to come to retreats, twice a year, for at least ten more years and counting… and in all that time, she has been the one with the biggest smile, the squeaziest hugs, the loudest encouragement, AND she would say she has been the one who has gained the most.

I wish all hard conversations went that well and produced so much fruit!!

I’m in a season when I frequently remind myself of that talk because I don’t hear a lot that is new in church and retreats these days, but that hasn’t always been the case. I grew up in the church. I attended a Christian school. I was a faithful pray-er and rule follower (most of my life). And yet, at the age of 30, God showed me that there was a tremendous amount of Bible history that had fallen between the cracks and there was a gaping disconnect between what I intellectually knew and heart-felt understood.

A friend said something like this to me this week:

“You can teach what you hear and read, but you can only minister what you have experienced and understand.”

And she’s right. At age 30, I was in a saving relationship with Jesus, but I had yet to be broken by His call on my life. That call created an insatiable hunger to know and understand the Bible.

I had read a Revised Standard Version since I was ten. As a teen in youth group I got a NIV to read along with teachers. I now visited the local Bible Book Store and bought an English Standard Version with study notes that were for life application. I read it cover to cover, including every note, and some chapters I read multiple times. It took me three years.

Luke 24 recounts how Jesus appeared to his disciples after his resurrection. Verse 45 says, “Then he opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures.” This became my constant prayer. Give me understanding. Make me “Godly Wise” rather than worldly wise (James 3). Teach me how the scriptures relate to one another. Teach me who You are even more. Change my life by it. Help me to be able to articulate what I learn so I can teach my children and others… because that’s a command for all of us, and I know that teaching is part of my call.

It was a long term investment on my part. Baby steps. We are completely reliant on God for the return. He’s faithful. He is sowing into our lives in ways we cannot comprehend, and even though it seemed slow, the renovation was massive. I always tell parents to teach their children right when they have the chance… it is so much better to send them off with a sound foundation to build upon then for them to find their house needs jacked up so that their foundation can be repaired or completely replaced.

Twenty years later, and I am still hungry for God’s Word. Every time I read, He can show me something new in something familiar. His Word meets me where I am. I can sit in church and read the passage that is being highlighted, and God will download an entire sermon series into my brain, even though it is not what the pastor is teaching. The pastor can be teaching baby food, and God can give me steak. I come home and read, and He piques my curiosity for something that never occurred to me before. An invitation. That’s how Holy Spirit rolls. We have to be willing to meet Him there though.

Where are you in your understanding of God’s word?? I want to encourage you to get hungry for what He will teach you about Himself and His vision for you and the world. There is no pressure to know it all right now. It’s a lifetime of learning, but if you consistently meet with God, His Word will meet you where you are. And no matter where you are as a student, what you have learned is something you can teach. As God is patient with us, we can keep showing up with big smiles, squeazy hugs, and loud encouragement, being patient with others and bringing them along.

You get more out than what you put in.

Photo Credits: Feature image taken at the FEC Conference in Fort Wayne, Indiana. (FEC- Fellowship of Evangelical Churches), Scripture image is NIV, Worship photo taken @ The Belonging Company in Nashville, TN, Masterpiece photo taken in an art store in Nashville, TN.